You Owe Me Glue on MySpace

An already cluttered internet has just become more crowded. You Owe Me Glue now has a MySpace page. You can find us at www.myspace.com/youowemeglue.

Not only can you see photographs of your favourite cast members but you can also listen to some audio sketches, including the infamous 'The Extra Mile'. It's not immediately apparent that there is more than one clip there though. Just click on the arrow under the small photograph to get the next sketch.

So what are you waiting for? Head on over there and get ready to laugh.

The Russian War

This is a short clip from Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, a comedy discussion programme. Denis Leary gets taken apart by comic Greg Giraldo. The look on Leary's face after he gets shot down is priceless. He completely fails to offer any kind of comeback and Quinn has to step in to spare his blushes. It's pretty funny.

Personally I quite like Denis Leary but he's not nearly as relevant a comedian as he thinks he is. I prefer him more as an actor. Though as an actor he's pretty one note.

Make Scott a Lady

Scott Agnew stars in this short film about a man wishing a sex change. It lasts about 8 minutes.

In my opinion it would have been a much better film had the final 90 seconds or so been the main focus. By that's just my opinion.

Once in a Lifetime

The documentary Once in a Lifetime charts the rags to riches to rags again rollercoaster ride of the New York Cosmos.

The team were no more than a parks side when Steve Ross head of Warner Communication got involved. He decided to go out and buy the best player in the world no matter what the cost.

So Pele arrived in New York and slowly the team who played on grass and dirt became the biggest superstars in America.

There is a clear villain in the story. Italian forward Giorgio Chinaglia. A man so arrogant he thought nothing of telling Pele to 'stay out wide'. Chinaglia takes the blame from most people for ending the wild ride of the Cosmos. Though he tells a different story.

It's quite an engaging tale. There are lots of different viewpoints, all the surviving major players provide their recollections. Well, all except Pele.

One of the more interesting characters in the story is goalkeeper Shep Messing. A man who looked more like a porn star than a footballer.

Here's an article from last year on the accompanying book from The Guardian.

This is an excellent site for NY Cosmos facts.

This Channel 4 site provides a very good insight into Chinaglia's Italian career.

The New Pornographers @ ABC2

I saw The New Pornographers at the ABC2 last night.

They were more than ably supported by Mates of State. A husband and wife duo from San Francisco they played for almost an hour and seemed to impress most of the crowd with their keyboard and drums style of rocking.

I’d heard a few of their songs before, but nothing really stuck with me. That’s changed now as they played a really solid set.

I felt that this show was much better than the last time TNP played here in December. The sound was much better as they made more use of the stage. There was one member less this time as keyboard player Blaine Thurier was missing.

Although I’m still disappointed that Neko Case doesn’t seem to tour with the band anymore, I have warmed to Kathryn Calder, who sang and played all the keyboard parts on her own last night.

The highlights for me were Only Divine Right, Miss Teen Word Power, My Slow Descent into Alcoholism, set closer Sing Me Spanish Techno and the final encore Letter from an Occupant. Picking out highlights though isn’t all that necessary as it was a really strong performance with not a weak song all night.

It’s nice to get to see them again in such a small venue. They still seem to be something of an obscure band in the UK at least. They gave out earplugs to audience members in the front row, so concerned were they that they were loud.

Below are a number of photographs. The first few are of Mates of State. The rest alternate between Kathryn Calder and TNP main man Carl Newman.

Tommy also has a review up.

Sydney Signing?

This is an interesting wee football story. Terry Butcher’s new side Sydney FC are apparently looking to buy Italian striker Christian Vieri.

Although Italian by birth Vieri grew up in Sydney and apparently according to his Bessie mate, would relish the opportunity to finish his career there.

The other interesting thing in the story for me is that So I Married an Axe Murderer star Anthony La Paglia is on the board at Sydney and may finance the move.

Glue T-Shirts

Yes here it is the first You Owe Me Glue T-shirt. We couldn’t afford models of the calibre Ronnie talks about here, so instead it’s Glue’s very own Fizz modelling this fine T.

If anyone does actually want one let us know and we can go and get some more made.

It's All About the Man in the Middle

The Champions’ League Final actually ended the way I had predicted before kick-off, with a 2-1 Barcelona victory.

The talk this morning however is all about the referee. We all know that the best referees are the ones no one notices. Last night’s match was shaping up into an excellent contest, until that moment in the18th minute.

Arsenal keeper Jens Lehman hauled down Barcelona’s Samuel Eto’o just outside the penalty box.

Had Terje Hauge, the Norwegian whistler (© Daily Record) allowed play to continue Guily would have put Barcelona one – nil up. Both teams would have had a full compliment of players and no one would have complained.

The rules to the letter of the law state that a foul of the kind committed by Lehman means he has to receive a red card. Though the common sense decision would have been to play on and allow Barca to knock the ball into an empty net.

Playing the advantage is an option open to referees and the better ones tend to take it.

In order to put their substitute keeper on Arsenal of course had to substitute an outfield player, in this case French midfielder Robert Pires.

This incident robbed us all of what was shaping up to be a cracking match.

A similar incident happened in the semi-final of last year where Petr Cech was the keeper involved. On that occasion play was allowed to continue and Liverpool scored. Although Jose Mourinhio has whinged about that particular goal ever since.

On talkSPORT this morning they commented that Thierry Heny didn’t have the best of matches as he didn’t see much of the ball. The Frenchman actually had an excellent game under the circumstances. Henry started the match brightly and chased after every ball. When Arsenal had to reshuffle after the red card he was never going to have as much of the ball as he should, one of the very reasons the game was spoiled as a spectacle. Then in the second half he was booked after making a perfectly fair tackle. As Henry himself said the booking then had an effect on the way he could commit to challenges for the rest of the game.

The referee also handed out a pointless booking to Henrik Larsson in the final minute as he jostled Almunia in a bid to waste time. The sensible thing to do would just have been to wave play on as the Arsenal keeper had plenty of room to get the ball upfield. Instead the ref blew for a free kick and booked the Barca player. Larsson wasn’t bothered. 25 of the last 60 seconds wasted.

I don’t think the ref in any way wanted Barcelona to win, I just think he wasn’t up to it. No stranger to controversy he was previously the subject of death threats from Chelsea fans. Never trusts refs who spend too much time on their hair, they'll think they're the main attraction.

As for the game itself it was a decent show despite the ref’s best efforts. Arsenal just couldn’t hang on to their lead and after the equaliser there was only one team going to win it.

Although I wanted the Gunners to win I was happy to see ex-Celt Larsson play a major part and pick up a winner’s medal. He was the difference between the two sides creating both goals.

UPDATE: Our Norwegian whistler is now beginning to regret his red card decision.

Get Arrested for the Last Time

The third (and final) season of Arrested Development is almost here. It will be released on Region One on August the 29th.

Have a look at the cover art here and go pre-order from Amazon here.

The Devil and Daniel Johnston

Over the weekend I saw The Devil and Daniel Johnston, a documentary about the musician and artist Daniel Johnston. It was a very funny, touching and sometimes sad story about a very gifted guy who has battled with mental illness.

The documentary is presented in chronological fashion and doesn’t assume that you already know much about him. Which most people don’t.

The film begins with Daniel’s precocious upbringing when the seeds of his creativity were growing. It features many of his early home movies, which were quite sophisticated for the time. This being the early 80s. They are also pretty funny.

It features interviews with all the people who were close to him and saw his career develop and fall apart first hand. We also see some of his early performances.

What comes across is that his song writing is brilliant, even if his singing, piano and guitar playing aren’t. He’s also very prolific.

My favourite bits were his manager being compared to Broadway Danny Rose and the family album…This is a photo of Daniel being taken away by the cops…this is him being wheeled into hospital.

The movie’s website is packed with a lot of interesting stuff.

New Hoose

A good few months of upheaval came to a (sort of) end for me on Friday when I moved into my plush new Falkirk gaff.

It’s taking a bit of getting used to.

We haven’t really had an upstairs before, so every time my wife gets up for the loo, I totally shite myself before remembering where I am and that, no, someone is not trying to break in via the loft.

Also, we now have a front and back door, which is freaking me out a bit as well, for no good reason.

We’ll all get used to it, as it’s a great place in what seems like a nice bit of the town. That’s the other really freaky bit about the place. You wake up in the morning to hear birds singing and FUCK ALL else.

Getting up and going to work this morning reminded me of the start of “28 Days Later”. I never saw another soul until I was down at the main road.

Will the family and I enjoy suburban bliss or have I moved to the Stepford Estate, where your neighbours tut if you don’t show up at the neighbourhood watch meetings?

I’ll keep you posted, if and when I can be arsed.

Musical Plugs

Two brief musical plugs. I’ve been listening a lot to both Rhett Miller and Regina Spektor recently.

Miller is a traditional rock ‘n’ roller and shares some musical style with his pal Ben Kweller.

Regina Spektor you may know slightly from being the woman behind the music in the cinema ads for Sky Sports. You know the one with the mad skateboarding out in the desert. Her great song Us plays over that. I know this may not seem like much of a recommendation, but she sounds a bit like a kookier Tori Amos.

They’re both worth a listen.

Find a Friend with You Owe Me Glue

There’s not many heart warming tales to tell when it comes to You Owe Me Glue, but here’s one. I was recently contacted by a girl called Priscilla in Holland thru the YOMG website. She was friends with Lindsay, who does our e-flyers, but they had lost touch some time ago. Through the power of Glue they are now back in touch and catching up furiously.

You don’t get many posts on here these days, so come on what d’you want from me?

A New Low

Any of you who have read Pish over the years will know I’ve had my beefs with Channel 4, but last night they sunk to a new low by broadcasting “The Fhonejacker”, without doubt the worst comedy show I have ever seen on British Television.

You have to ask why Channel 4 even exists these days.

Given that its part publicly funded and has a public service remit, questions must be asked about why the channel is so desperately failing to deliver.

In terms of quality programming, it has been taken over by channel Five, which has to be totally humiliating. In fact, Five is starting to take prestige programming like cricket coverage away from 4.

These days, Channel 4 gives us little more than American imports, cheap, poor quality factual programming and out-dated reality pap.

Take this Comedy Lab offering last night as an example. I understand that Comedy Lab material isn’t always going to be conventionally funny, and that in many ways, that’s the point.

But throw a rock in any primary school playground and you’ll hit a child funnier than the guy who put together this travesty.

The programme featured a guy doing prank phone calls to “unsuspecting” members of the public.

The problem? Ever single person he called was savvy to his pish the second he came on the phone.

What ensued were a series of cringingly unfunny exchanges between this talentless buffoon and people annoyed to find themselves having their time wasted by a tit.

Oh yes, and he managed to come up with a character so witlessly racist Jim Davidson would have baulked at the prospect of performing it.

I had always been under the impression that getting a show on the tele involved talent, hard work and persistence but it turns out I was wrong.

Apparently all you have to do is come up with a hilarious “darkie” impression and participate in a practice most people grow out of before they get pubes.

Now I know, eh? Seriously, a new, all-time broadcasting low.

Pish is 2 Today!

Hosanna!!!

Pish is two today, a fact we almost never noticed.

To celebrate, here's a picture of a dog.

That’s right just a picture of a dog.

Look at him there, all furry and everything.

One Title Lost, But Glory Still Beckons…

Boo hoo. For the first time in my 3 season long fantasy football league career, I’ve lost a league title.

I came 3rd in the work Herald league.

My ovine-bothering Northern colleague Innes came 2nd and some guy who’s a mate of a sacked employee and doesn’t even work here came first.

There was talk that the winner would get FA Cup final tickets but of course, that’s hasn’t been mentioned for months, since the two highest placed staff members are mere plebs and not management top brass.

I’m actually quite chuffed with my “UEFA Cup place” finish as I was 15th at Xmas and looking dead and buried.


However, true to form, I am on the verge of winning both The Cheerybananship and The YOMG European title, which will take my tally to 5 league title wins out of 6 entered.

Only a miracle in the European Cup Final and the last round of German, Italian and Spanish fixtures can help my rivals prevent a creditable Domestic and European Double for the Fizzmeister.


Of course, the impact of these facts on my soul destroying desk jockey job are minimal, but when do I ever let real life get in the way of crowing about how brilliant I am like some sort of big man?

The Magician

We’ve not had a film review on here for a while, so here’s one now. I saw The Magician over the weekend. It’s an Australian mock-documentary about Ray Shoesmith, an amoral hitman.

For a quick pitch you could call it Man Bites Dog meets Chopper. Iain, our resident cartoonist, hates the Man Bites Dog comparison cos he hated MBD, but loved The Magician. The comparison begins and ends with the fact both films are documentaries of hitmen. The Magician has much more in common with Chopper in the matter of fact way it handles violence and the protagonist’s attitude to it.

Scott Ryan, wrote, directed and takes the lead role in which he’s never less than entertaining.

It’s a film that is based mainly on dialogue with only a few well timed action pieces.

On the whole I enjoyed it. However there are a few things left unexplained for me. We never learn who, if anyone is charging Ray with his tasks and one of his major decisions in the film never really feels as if it’s fully explained. That’s small criticism though in a film that holds your attention throughout.

In the screening I was in I counted 11 walk-outs. It’s really not that graphic. Neither is the dialogue all that crude. I wondered if some of the audience thought they were going to see a film about an actual magician.

Grant McLennan 1958-2006

I was shocked this morning to hear of the death of Go-Betweens’ singer Grant McLennan at the age of only 48.

I posted only a few weeks ago about The Go-Betweens and how good a songwriting team McLennan and Robert Forster were. I saw them play twice, the first time in May 1999 a decade after The Go-Betweens had broken up. They played as a duo doing Go-Betweens songs and stuff from their solo careers. It was an outstanding show and I remember us patting Robert Forster on the back as they made their way through the crowd to go back for another encore. That tour led to them deciding to reform the band.

The last time I saw them play was only a year ago at the Renfrew Ferry. They treated the show as a homecoming, as they had been based in Glasgow briefly at the beginning of their career when they were signed with Postcard Records.

They both casually chatted with the crowd like old pals, as they ran through their back catalogue. I remember McLennan dedicating The Devil’s Eye to Edwyn Collins, who at the time was seriously ill.

I think The Go-Betweens were unique in being one of the few bands who actually got better after reforming. Their last few albums produced some of their finest work.

Their recent DVD That Striped Sunlight Sound gives a real insight into their song writing abilities as they discuss their career and play songs on two acoustic guitars. It highlights the competitive rivalry that he enjoyed with Forster. A rivalry that made them both better songwriters and contributed to what a great band The Go-Betweens were.

His tragic death brings to an end one of the finest song writing duos of the last 25 years.

This links to a tribute to him on the Lo-Max Records website, where they also print the lyrics to one of his best songs, Cattle and Cane.

There’s a number of tributes on the Go-Betweens messageboard including several from Glasgow including Teenage Fanclub’s Norman Blake & Gerry Love, BMX Bandits' Duglas T Stewart and former footballer Pat Nevin. This links to a photoset of a show they did at Avalanche Records in Edinburgh last year. There are also tributes on the TFC messageboard.

Poor Turnout, Good Show

Had you been at the March Glue, you could have been forgiven for thinking that ours was a show on its way.

With 50+ folk paying on the door, we struggled and eventually failed to seat everyone who arrived for what turned out to be a ramshackle but enjoyable show.

April’s show was beset with problems from the outset – no Dazza meant we were a man down from the off, and Anne Marie pulling out later on left us really struggling.

But, given that we had 3 rehearsals (only one with sound and light guru Chris) 12 new sketches and had to draft in a ringer (the excellent Sara Harrison) we turned in as good as show as we’ve ever done in terms of performance the other night, unfortunately this time to only about 15 people.

I felt the show was a little unbalanced, largely because of the sketches we couldn’t do and one or two of the sketches will benefit from a polish, but by and large it was a quality show.

So why the low turnout? Well, there are excuses to be had. Bank holiday, blah, blah blah…..

But we’re shite at promotion. Virtually no-one outside of our circle of friends and acquaintances know we even exist.

This isn’t helped by the venue, who don’t even mention us on their “What’s On” blackboard.

But it’s mainly down to us not putting in the work and not involving anyone who knows how to promote a show.

I feel we have a good package that just needs to be sold right for more people to be interested in, but if the purpose of Glue is to get us all some work, you have to say that so far, it’s been a failure.

Perhaps we should be putting our limited time and energy into demo and show-reel projects in future.

Doing the live shows is certainly fun, but I get the increasing feeling that we battering our heads against a brick wall.

A Quiet Glue

Friday night’s You Owe Me Glue was probably the lowest attended yet. I think we had 15 folk through the door. Some left at half time, some wandered in then for nothing.

So a pishy attendance that we can put down to who knows what, bank holiday, apathy, poor promotion, competing shows?

As for the show itself it went quite well. I was disappointed in my own performance, but as we all know I am something of a perfectionist. Seriously though the performances were all good and the folk there seemed to enjoy it.

Sara did a good job coming in so late and Alison and Moira found themselves with more to do than they’ve ever had before, but rose to it well.

Hard to say what stuff went down the best with such a small crowd, but there were only a couple of the new sketches I’d rest for next time.

And next time is of course in Blackfriars on Friday 26th May @ 8pm.

There are some photographs below. The first one is of what we almost used as our curtain. We did however get a proper black sheet up.