A League of Our Own

Another week in The Iomartership and Ronnie is still clinging to his lead on 92 points. With Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink posting 24 points up front and Ledley King at Spurs providing a further 18, he’s looking hard to displace.

In second 6 points behind, is the league’s First Lady, Nicola’s CSFPG FC. Erik Edman has proved a winning signing for her, bringing him in to replace Sol Campbell as she did and her midfield engine room of Lampard and Ljungberg have pulled in 45 points between them.

Neltic FC are a further two points behind, benefiting greatly from Kevin Kuranyi’s weekend hat-trick for Stuttgart. And who would have thought the Birmingham keeper would have brought in 10 points already thus far.

What’s happened to Keith? Has he been overcome by those gas fumes he thinks he smells? As he is 23 points off the pace on 69, despite being the joint leader at one stage last week. With Mourinhio and St James’ Park bringing home the bacon he’s looking to the sidelines and not the pitch for his points.

Lokomtiv Sausages are breathing down his neck on 68 with a strong midfield and front line, but not much else.

2 points further back, it’s my Serenity Now. Jay-Jay Okocha and Alan Smith are the only lads doing the business. I was still losing points for Paul Sturrock, despite him no longer being the boss of Southampton. Perhaps he’s missed a couple of signing-ons down the brew. However a bleating e-mail from me, has resolved this issue and I’m back with the measly 3 points the dud will earn me all season.

Pre-tournament favourites Big Fanny Failures are in the second from bottom position. His manager and stadium have yet to come into play though so perhaps Fizzy may start climbing the table shortly.

Staring relegation in the face is Karen’s West Bam United, 43 points behind the von brauns, despite Kuranyi’s hat-trick. However with the Spanish league just kicking off and another fortnight until Serie A comes in, our league has hardly begun.

With an international weekend coming up, this is how things will stand for a couple of weeks. However the start of a new month brings with it new transfers and everyone should be keeping a keen eye on today's transfer deadline, to see if they have to make any team changes.